Boy, I feel this part SO DEEPLY: “you feel like maybe you have gone past the point of no return. You’ve squashed any kind of creative potential. You’ve dampened the energy. All you’re left with is rampant time for overthinking and obsessing about all the projects that you’re not working on.”
So glad that landed. Was really feeling that in this situation I know the only way to get over that feeling is to just sit down and work on said project, but when you don’t have the energy or wherewithal to do that, then I don’t know whah the solution is!
Yes!! Ugh. I think it probably has to do with surrender and trusting that you’ll come back when you can. But that just never feels reassuring in the moment.
Oh Anna, this spoke to my soull. I broke my foot at the start of my holidays and two days before going away. And I felt everything you mentionned. I started walking again last tuesday after 6 weeks of what I call "stillness". It feels good but not september good as I usually love this time of the year, especially in the south of France. But maybe that's what I needed this summer. It all happens for a reason...
A lovely post with all the real things. Congratulations on getting yourself into the new house, and much hope that you and they will have a compelling time getting go know one another. Thanks too, for the Agnes Martin Quotes. Just the right words at just the right moment. As were yours.
I had Covid in June and experienced exactly what you describe here--my squirrel brain increasingly desperate to Do Things ("maybe what I need to do is reorganize my entire task management system???") and my physical self saying, nope, we just need to lie down and gaze vacantly out the window for several hours, sorry. It was so frustrating. I'm glad you're beginning to feel more like yourself again! Thanks for this, and for Agnes Martin, and the general reminder that creative energy will always eventually return.
This reminded me of the sadness I felt four years ago when devastating wildfires and smoke filled skies took much of the magic of September from us in Oregon. Makes me more grateful when fall feels like fall!
I actually really love that I wrote and shared my September newsletter today right before reading this one. This is all so good and so much of it resonates with me and how I've been feeling all month—especially this line you shared from Agnes Martin: "I will have to be by myself almost all the time and it will be a quiet life.” A(wo)men to that. P.S. I'm excited to see your new place and make more friend memories in it the next time we're in your neck o' the woods! Three cheers for birch tree views [the house I grew up in had a birch tree out front]. 💛
Boy, I feel this part SO DEEPLY: “you feel like maybe you have gone past the point of no return. You’ve squashed any kind of creative potential. You’ve dampened the energy. All you’re left with is rampant time for overthinking and obsessing about all the projects that you’re not working on.”
So glad that landed. Was really feeling that in this situation I know the only way to get over that feeling is to just sit down and work on said project, but when you don’t have the energy or wherewithal to do that, then I don’t know whah the solution is!
Yes!! Ugh. I think it probably has to do with surrender and trusting that you’ll come back when you can. But that just never feels reassuring in the moment.
What is the song you play? I apologize if I missed it in my reading...
ha! I didn't link to it so that it would be mysterious ;) But it's Nervous Tics by Maribou State (ft. Holly Walker)
It was mysterious! THANK YOU for sharing! Love this newsletter BTW!
Oh good! Was hoping it wouldn’t come off as too “complainy” :)
Beautiful post, Anna.
Oh thank you, so glad you liked it.
Oh Anna, this spoke to my soull. I broke my foot at the start of my holidays and two days before going away. And I felt everything you mentionned. I started walking again last tuesday after 6 weeks of what I call "stillness". It feels good but not september good as I usually love this time of the year, especially in the south of France. But maybe that's what I needed this summer. It all happens for a reason...
A lovely post with all the real things. Congratulations on getting yourself into the new house, and much hope that you and they will have a compelling time getting go know one another. Thanks too, for the Agnes Martin Quotes. Just the right words at just the right moment. As were yours.
I had Covid in June and experienced exactly what you describe here--my squirrel brain increasingly desperate to Do Things ("maybe what I need to do is reorganize my entire task management system???") and my physical self saying, nope, we just need to lie down and gaze vacantly out the window for several hours, sorry. It was so frustrating. I'm glad you're beginning to feel more like yourself again! Thanks for this, and for Agnes Martin, and the general reminder that creative energy will always eventually return.
Happy birthday month. It’s mine too!!
Oh yay!! Back at you!
This reminded me of the sadness I felt four years ago when devastating wildfires and smoke filled skies took much of the magic of September from us in Oregon. Makes me more grateful when fall feels like fall!
Oh I remember that fall. Have a lot of depressing sky photos on my phone from then. But agreed: makes you all the more ready to savor the season.
Beautiful, beautiful work, Anna. Thank you for this.
Thank you Sara ❤️
Oh how I feel you! Pretty much in the same state these days! And I love Howard Thurman ❤️
October can be our September 😜
I actually really love that I wrote and shared my September newsletter today right before reading this one. This is all so good and so much of it resonates with me and how I've been feeling all month—especially this line you shared from Agnes Martin: "I will have to be by myself almost all the time and it will be a quiet life.” A(wo)men to that. P.S. I'm excited to see your new place and make more friend memories in it the next time we're in your neck o' the woods! Three cheers for birch tree views [the house I grew up in had a birch tree out front]. 💛